


A Breath of Sunshine

by solesurvivor2287



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Angst, Awkward Flirting, Dialogue Heavy, F/M, Feelings, First Kiss, Fluff, I'm Bad At Tagging, Interspecies Relationship(s), Interspecies Romance, Jaal doesn't get idioms, Jaal is clueless, May stray from canon, Ryder is mad, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Too many feels at times, sam is sassy, sassy ryder, sort of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-11-05 09:38:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11010798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solesurvivor2287/pseuds/solesurvivor2287
Summary: My playthrough of MEA, exploring the friendships aboard the Tempest as well as the budding romance between an emotional yet awkward Sara Ryder and a clueless Jaal. I'm terrible at summaries, I know. Won't focus too much on cut scenes from in game, would rather focus on the in betweens of the main missions. Story begins after Jaal's loyalty mission and will jump around.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Anyone else feel like Ryder's reaction to Jaal getting shot is pretty...meh? I thought so. I know I'd flip my shit if I were her.

_“Ryder. He has my family, but I don’t think I can do this alone.” Jaal felt as if his world was crumbling around him. This was the last thing he needed - losing his siblings to the Roekaar._

_She felt a small lump in her throat as she closed the space between them, resting her small hand on his shoulder and giving a gentle squeeze. “You don’t have to, Jaal. Just tell me the time and place.” She paused briefly, “We’ll bring them back, I promise.”_  

_A small smile curled on his lips, “No hesitation. That is what I love about you.” He pulled her close into a tight embrace, breathing in her scent. She felt her stomach flutter at his words, and sighed with relief as she felt herself nearly melting into him. If anyone told her she’d be in the arms of their newest crew member, she’d laugh at them - or punch them. They’d certainly come a long way from before. Sara remembered how stupid she felt that one time he called her “pathetic” - which turned out to be a miscommunication there. Or the time when she asked if he'd like to elaborate on his thoughts and he bluntly replied “I do not”. A long way they've come, indeed._  

_~*~_

Sara stormed into the Tempest, with the rest of her team quietly trailing behind her. Jaal was the last to get onboard, and he knew better than to push it. They’d just gotten back from Havarl - from dealing with Akksul, to be more precise. Sure he wasn’t going to be a problem for them anymore and his siblings were back home, but everyone knew why Sara was angry.

No, angry was an understatement.

She threw her helmet aside before unbuckling her armor and letting it fall to the floor with a dull thud, not caring about where it landed. She was usually more careful with her armor, but now all she wanted was to be alone and deal with everything else later. She was at a loss for words over how reckless Jaal was in dealing with Akksul, letting him get shot like that. She shouldn’t have listened to him, she should have put a bullet in Akksul’s head herself, she didn’t give a damn about the consequences. She didn’t care that Akksul was a terrible shot. It didn’t matter - she almost lost Jaal. That was something that was not at all okay with her.

Vetra and Liam quietly slipped out of their armor. Jaal leaned against the wall of the cargo bay, waiting for - if - Sara’s mood would falter.

It didn’t. Instead, she stomped her way to her quarters, leaving Cora and Drack confused, what the hell did they miss? Cora threw her arm in front of Drack, preventing him from following Ryder to her quarters. She knew this was a time to give her space, even though Drack disagreed. The squishy human had been growing on him and Drack, in his typical fashion, had grown overprotective of her. He'd tell her that she reminded him of one of his own granddaughters, Kesh.

Before Lexi could call her in for her routine checkup, Sara rushed into her quarters, locking the doors behind her.

“SAM, no one comes in.” She barked as she removed the rest of her under armor. “That door stays locked, don’t care who it is or why.” She added as she climbed into her shower, the one and what felt like, only, perk of being the Pathfinder: personal shower and bathroom.

“Of course, Sara.” Typically SAM would give some sort of smartass retort, but based on what happened back on Havarl, he knew better. He'd tested her numerous times before and she's joked back about how she'd blow up SAM Node herself if she had to - although this time he's not sure if she'd be kidding. And that was something SAM didn't want to find out.

*~*

Tension lingered in the air of the cargo bay as the rest of the crew tried to figure out what had gotten under her skin so badly. Usually Sara was chipper after a mission, at least put together enough where she'd do her normal rounds, put away her armor and weapons in her locker, hell even enjoy a drink or two with whoever was up for it. This time...this was different. 

“What the hell happened? Vetra? Liam?” Cora crossed her arms and looked between the two, ignoring Jaal who was pathetically waiting in the background, shoulders slouched and with a worried expression all over his face. Her eyes lingered on Liam, it had to have been something he said, maybe he'd already caused an interspecies incident? After all, the relationship between the angara and the Initiative had been _decent…_ but fragile. They had a near miss after the little unsanctioned armor swap between Liam and Jaal that happened several weeks earlier, luckily Ryder nipped it in the bud before either side could get offended.

Liam threw his hands up in defense, “Don’t look at me! I didn’t do anything, for once.” He added at the end, cheekily.

Jaal quietly cleared his threat and stepped out from behind the pair, “I believe I’m the cause behind her…”

“Outburst?” Vetra finished for him before shrugging in agreement. “Yeah, she didn't seem too happy with you back there.” Again, “not too happy” was the understatement of the century. Vetra had to sit in between Ryder and Jaal on the shuttle ride back to Daar Pelaav, she knew if Ryder got anywhere close to Jaal she probably would have shot him herself. Even though Ryder didn’t _outright_ say it, everyone knew her ‘fondness’ for the angara, although fond may have been too light of a word to use. Anyways, no matter how hard she tried to hide her blush whenever he called her ‘dearest’ or complimented her combat skills in dealing with the kett, it was pretty damn obvious why she was livid.

Drack grunted at the thought of Jaal being the reason behind Ryder’s mood, he knew that she had a soft spot for the pretty boy, which was the one thing that stopped him from spacing him himself. 

Before Cora could question him any further, Lexi found the group in the cargo bay, “What is going on with Ryder?”

Jaal kept his eyes on the ground while the rest of the group shrugged, “Jaal got shot by Akksul.” Liam blurted out.

Lexi gasped and moved towards Jaal to examine his wound, only for him to wince away when she tried to reach for it. “I need to clean this out, Jaal.”

He tried to reassure her, “It’s fine.” He gently pushed past her and the rest of the group, “I should go and try to talk to Sara. She's upset with me, I feel it.”

“Don't we all,” Liam muttered dryly, only for Vetra to elbow him in the ribs. Lexi pinched the bridge of her nose before waving Jaal off, not wanting to argue. “Fine. Afterwards, stop by. And I'm not asking you.” She added sternly at the end, eliciting a small smile from Drack.

The cargo bay emptied out as the crew resumed their duties, leaving Jaal behind with his own thoughts. Drack was the last one to leave, as he couldn't leave without giving a gentle warning to Jaal, “Don't fuck with Ryder.” He growled before leaving.

Jaal quietly paced the cargo bay, thinking of how he could even approach her without getting hit with some form of her biotics but his thoughts were interrupted by a certain flirty asari.

“What's up, Jaal? You alright?” She asked, coyly. Peebee had been mostly tinkering with the Remnant core she was able to nab on Kadara, before any exiles could get their hands on it. There was some ruckus, but she didn’t bother checking it out. There was a reason she lived in the escape pod and kept to herself - relationships were too much of a hassle. But there was something about Jaal hanging out quietly in the cargo bay by himself that seemed a bit off.

He rubbed the back of his neck, tenderly - making a small note to himself to actually get checked out by Lexi later. The last thing he needed was half the crew wanting to throw him out the airlock for not listening.

“Yes, thank you.” He answered, albeit shortly. “I should go.” He cut her off before she could reply, or worse - uncomfortably hit on him, like she did with everyone else.

“Uh, okay, fine.” She said to herself as she watched him wander off to Sara’s quarters. Peebee shook her head to herself, _this whole ship needs to get laid_ , she thought to herself as she returned to her little sanctuary.

~*~

_“‘Not for a long time’?” She repeated after him. Why did she have a feeling that this was a story with a not so happy ending?_  

_“I fell in love with a girl once. Allia. We were young...I was young.” He explained, his face looking slightly pained as he thought back to his first - and only - love. He promised himself after the heartbreaks that followed that he would just close himself off...and that he did._

_Though there was a small part of him that felt like Sara was trying to wriggle in past all the walls he’s spent the last ten years building up, and there was another, maybe even smaller part of him, that didn’t mind._

_Ryder lent an open ear as he talked about this girl, Allia, and the pain she’d put him through. She felt her stomach tighten as he talked about how she left him for his brother and joined his family, reminding her of her own first love._

_“What about you, Ryder?” Jaal interrupted her thoughts, looking in her eyes with those big blue eyes she felt she could get lost in._

_“I’ve been in love too,” she gave a small smile before looking away, “More than once actually, never really learned my lesson.” She added, with a slight chuckle. Sara talked about her first love, an turian she met while living on the Citadel. Like anyone else’s first love, she thought they were going to be together forever and live happily ever after - well that changed after her father’s discharge from the Alliance, all over his AI research. After that, being Alec Ryder’s daughter wasn’t a good thing, she lost her friends and her first love. Then there was the asari she met on her research expeditions, but it fizzled out as quickly as it started, they were just too different. That and the whole life span thing didn’t make things easier._

_Soon after this, Sara wanted to direct the conversation into a happier tune. And she did that in quite possibly the most awkward way possible, “Well, enough of that sad shit, right?” She rubbed the back of her neck and felt her heart thump in her chest, “I think you’re super cool and interesting and I would really like to get to know you better, I mean only if you’re interested. I wouldn’t want to force you to do anything, I just think, you know, it’d be really nice. Oh god, I’m talking too much aren’t I?” She blurted out the mouthful in what felt like a single breath and waited what felt like a lifetime for his response._

_He responded with a hearty laugh, and she felt like she could release the breath she’d been holding, “Yes. I’d like that.”_

_She was nearly taken aback. What the hell is it with these angara? She thought she was actually getting somewhere with Jaal and that’s all she gets? Her face reddened before speaking up again, “That’s all?”_  

_What he said next nearly swept her off her feet - and that wasn’t something easy to do. “You are a lovely woman, fascinating, a brilliant risk-taker. Knowing you better would be a gift. Sincerely.”_

_Well, damn._

_“Wow Jaal, aren’t you a panty dropper?” Liam said with a chuckle, clearly eavesdropping on their conversation. It wasn’t too hard seeing as their conversation had been taking place in the crew quarters, with Liam only a few feet away._

_“Panty dropper?” Jaal repeated, confused, was this another one of those human idioms?_

_He didn’t get the chance to ask, instead snorting at the shade of red Sara was getting._

_“Ugh, Liam! Fuck off!” Sara shouted as she used her biotics to throw nearest object she could - as hard as she could - missing Liam’s head._

_“Get a room!” He shouted back as Ryder slid out of the crew quarters, leaving the burden of explaining the idiom to Jaal on Liam._

~*~

Sara tossed and turned in her bed for what felt like hours as she tried to find a comfortable position. This was probably the easiest she’d been in bed, but she certainly did not feel relaxed enough to get sleep. No, sleep was the last thing on her mind. 

She finally gave up and sat up, “SAM, what time is it?”

 “It is only 2345. How are you feeling, Sara?” The AI asked, quietly. While SAM couldn’t _technically_ feel, there was no doubt he was worried about Ryder.

 “Fine. I just need a drink.” She rubbed her temple tenderly before climbing out of bed, making her way to her small stash. As she poured herself a drink, SAM interrupted her thoughts, “Ryder, Jaal is requesting entry.”

 She took a sip of her drink, enjoying the small burn it gave as it made its way to her stomach, this was the good stuff. “Nope, don’t care.” Sara hated being like this, a part of her felt like she was being unfair to the crew by shutting all of them out like this - shutting Jaal out like this. But the other part of her was still just so angry and well, hurt. Even though nothing happened and Jaal was fine, she could only focus on the what-ifs: what if Akksul was a good shot, what if he _wanted_ to kill Jaal, what if…

 “Jaal is saying it’s urgent.”

Ryder took a deep breath and finished the rest of her drink, thinking that she’ll need it to relax herself for this upcoming conversation. “Fine.” She replied, shortly, “Just lock the door behind him.” Last thing she needed was an audience for whatever the hell was coming.

 This was most definitely going to be a long night. She silently cursed herself for not having enough alcohol for the night - she certainly was going to need it. 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaal and Sara have a chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else get salty when Jaal flirts with basically anyone who isn't Ryder? I know I did :P Also italics are flashbacks, in case it wasn't clear. Hope you guys are enjoying this as much as I am writing it!

She plopped down on her couch and watched the doors open, revealing Jaal, who hesitantly stepped in, allowing the doors behind him to lock. Her jaw tightened several times before she felt her face relax some, she was still upset - no doubt, but seeing him put her a little at ease.

That didn’t take away from his recklessness.

She gestured for him to sit down and he chose her bed to keep the distance between the two. Part of her didn’t even want to look at him, but she did.

“Sara, I-” He began before fumbling over his words, unsure of how or where to begin. Does he thank her? Apologize? Hold her? Jaal desperately wanted the third option, he hated the thought of being behind her pain. “I wanted to...thank you for trusting me earlier.”

Was he trying to kill her? Her hand tightened around her drink but she kept her cool and her eyes on him, giving him the signal to keep talking. “Killing Akksul would have only made the Roekaar stronger, it was the only choice.” He paused as he rubbed the wound, briefly pondering about the scar it would leave, “I’m glad he did - it exposed how far he’d fallen.”

Sara calmly put down her glass, any harder and she probably would have shattered it. She had no option but to stay calm, if she were to continue being Pathfinder she was going to have to learn how to keep her feelings in check, for not just the sake of herself but for the sake of everyone else. “You're...glad?” She spoke up, breaking the moment of silence between them, her voice shaky as she tried to make sense of his reasoning. In what universe could someone be glad over getting shot? “How Jaal? Akksul shot you. He fucking shot you, and you're thanking me because I didn't shoot him?!” She felt her voice start to rise and tears stinging her eyes, damn it, she told herself she wouldn't cry. Not in front of Jaal, not in front of anyone.

Her fists clenched and she felt the warm rush of her biotics flaring up as she continued, “He attacked Podromos on top of that! I shouldn't have listened to you, Jaal. I should have fucking shot him myself and ended all this bullshit right there.” She turned away from him and crossed her arms tightly, not wanting to see the pained expression on Jaal’s face. “I can't believe you're glad that that maniac shot you.”

“Akksul was never a good shot, he missed. I wasn't hurt, Sara. I'm here now.” He remained seated but tried to reassure her, unsure if he would be able to close the distance. Jaal felt so small at the moment, but that didn't mean he had any regret for what happened with Akksul. He knew, and would continue to stand by, that shooting him would have only made him a martyr and drive more angara to his cause. They didn't need that.

But on the other hand, he understood where Ryder was coming from. She didn't outright say it, but he knew she didn't want to come face to face with Akksul after the attempted attack on the human colony, Podromos. Even though she promised him that she wouldn't shoot Akksul on sight, he knew it killed her inside to make that promise. If it were up to her, Akksul would have multiple bullet wounds - as well as any other Roekaar who dared stand in her way.

“It doesn't matter.” She turned back to him but her voice remained firm, “Don’t you get it, Jaal? If he were an inch off, you wouldn't even be here right now talking to me. We'd have to be carrying you-”

“I am here though.” He interrupted her, not wanting her to say the rest.

Jaal moved to the couch and gently reached for her hand, knowing full well of the consequences if she didn't want that to happen. He was surprised when she allowed him to hold her hand, but she still seemed unnerved. Unnerved was better than get-away-from-me-before-I-charge-you though-the-hull-of-the-Tempest though.

“I know.” She said quietly as she used the back of her hand to wipe away the tears that started to slide down her cheeks. Her face winced in pain as she continued, “It’s just - you guys are all I have anymore. My dad’s dead, my brother is in a coma and I don't even know when - if - he’ll wake up.” She sniffled as she thought back to Scott, damn how she missed him so much. If he were the Pathfinder, which he should have been, he would know exactly what to do. What decisions to make and on top of that, keeping his emotions in check. Without him she just felt like a blubbering emotional mess, she wasn't supposed to be Pathfinder. This wasn't supposed to be her job, and she's had that reminder nearly everyday since losing her dad.

Jaal nodded quietly, taking in her words as she spoke up again, “I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to any of you under my command...” Her voice trailed off at the end as she tried to regain her composure. Sara nearly forgot about her hand being held in Jaal’s, but welcomed the familiar warmth. It felt like that was the only thing keeping her grounded at the moment. It was in times like these where she really missed her family.

Jaal interrupted her thoughts when he took the risk and pulled her into him, wrapping his thick arms around her, feeling relieved when she let out a small sigh and relaxed. He ran his hand through her hair, taking in the feeling of the little strands of hair between his thumb and fused fingers. He remembered when he first met Ryder, how fascinating and strange her hair was, and even found himself wondering later if there was hair on other parts of her. Humans were so strange to him. She was so strange to him, but that’s what drew him in.

“I’m sorry for upsetting you today.” He murmured softly against the top of her head, waiting for her response. “I will...be more careful next time.”

He felt her tighten in his grip, only for her to relax before speaking, “There’s no next time, Jaal. If I see him again, I’m going to shoot him.” Sure, it wouldn’t be the best idea. But neither was hit trying to attack Podromos and neither was him shooting Jaal.

“That is not a good plan, Sara.”

“I can’t make any promises.” She said, lightly as her tone was starting to change. She felt a little bad for shutting him out earlier, but she just needed some time to herself, some time to think and let the anger ride itself out. Sara sat up, pulling herself away from him to look at him instead, “I’m sorry too, Jaal. I shouldn’t let myself get worked up like this, I’m a Pathfinder...as much as I don’t want to be, I need to learn to control my emotions.”

Jaal reached forward and gently cupped her face, “Don’t ever apologize for showing me your emotions. I would be upset too if the roles had been reversed.”

She smiled and moved into his touch, “Good, because I’m still not over it.” A frown formed on her face as she thought back to seeing the bullet barely graze his face, “I don’t know what I would do if I lost any of the crew...especially you.”

He squeezed her cheek before moving his hand back to hers, “You won’t.” It was just two simple words but it was all she needed to hear to feel just...relieved. Relaxed. All she wanted was to lie in his arms and sleep away the days with him, to wake up and find that the Archon was dead and the galaxy was habitable and everyone would have a happy and peaceful home.

But of course, nothing was ever that easy.

~*~

_Ryder was annoyed. Irritated. Over it. She hated Kadara, she hated driving around it, she hated being there. She wasn’t particularly fond of the people there, especially that bitch Sloane. And she couldn’t stand being around the overly touchy Reyes, even if he proved to be very useful._

_But what made everything even more of a pain in the ass was her overly flirty crew members, Jaal and Peebee. What the hell was it with these angara? Why was Jaal so closed off to her, telling her to come back later whenever she wanted to chat with him, yet here he was flirting up and down with Peebee? Okay, sure, whatever, start with the asari in the Cultural Center. But don’t call Ryder “special” and “fascinating”, don’t tell her that you enjoy spending time with her and then the next moment tell Peebee how interesting the asari are...and don’t especially talk about mating..._

_Sara tried her best to ignore it, tried telling herself that Jaal was just being friendly with the crew. There was still some pain in hearing it though, since she finally thought she was getting somewhere with him. Especially after their whole conversation about previous partners and him being open to the idea of getting to know her better. Yeah, about that - what was going on in the backseat was not convincing her that he was even telling her the truth in that conversation._

_Ryder attempted to tune them out during the ride, even considering giving Sloane a call to chat about Kadara’s trading or techniques on dealing with the kett. Instead, she found herself getting more and more irritated as the two went on._

_“Your eyes have such fire, Peebee. It’s thrilling. You were bold to make the journey here.”_

_“Yeah? Thanks. I guess I was - am. You have pretty eyes too, Jaal.”_

_Before Jaal could reply, Ryder slammed on the brakes of the Nomad, nearly sending the pair into the front seat by her. Was it petty, considering full well that she knew they never buckled in? Sure was, but she didn’t give a damn. Her grip on the steering wheel was so tight that her knuckles were starting to turn white, but she needed to stop whatever was going on before she decided to drive into a sulfur lake. Ryder hated games, especially when she thought she was losing._

_“Ow, what the fuck!” Peebee yelled as her face slammed into the front seat. She was merely a casualty, the sudden stop was more of a punishment for Jaal, who didn’t move as quickly - luckily for him._

_Sara looked over her shoulder to the two of them before leaving her eyes on Jaal, “Are you two done already? Can’t you get a damn room?” She asked, her tone much harsher than she intended. Ryder tried to avoid making it obvious that she was feeling slightly jealous at the attention Peebee was getting, and especially how easily she was getting it._

_Peebee raised an eyebrow in response, “Me? And Jaal?” She asked and she looked between the two, quizzically, “No way, you can have him, Ryder.” She snorted as Jaal gave her a quick side-eye, nearly offended at how easily she bartered him off._

_Ryder groaned even louder in response, she was already aware that Peebee flirted with anything that had a heartbeat, hell she was surprised the asari hadn’t already hit up SAM or her comatose brother, but it was Jaal who she was more than irked with. How the hell was she supposed to compete with the beautiful blue alien race that could mate with pretty much any alien species?_

_“I did not think we were flirting, Ryder. Peebee is just rather easy to talk to, I find that our banter helps pass time.” Banter is what he called it? Maybe it was a cultural difference, but that didn’t sound like typical banter. Telling someone they have fire in their eyes was not typical small talk, to her, that was keywords for something a lot more explicit._

_Peebee climbed out of the Nomad, not wanting to get in the middle of them, “I’ll leave this to you two, seeing as there’s trouble in paradise already.”_

_They quietly watched her leave the Nomad and Ryder felt her face warming up, damn it, this was not what she wanted. She didn’t want to be jealous, she didn’t want to be stuck in the Nomad with an angara who couldn’t understand the difference between friendly chats and ‘friendly’ flirting. She didn’t want to be on Kadara either. Turns out, there was a lot of things she didn’t want._

_“Does our banter offend you, Ryder? I did not mean to-” Jaal began, but was interrupted by the sound of Sara’s forehead hitting the steering wheel, causing the horn of the Nomad to go off._

_“Just shut up, Jaal.” She said before waving Peebee to come back in._

_She got what she wanted after all, since the ride back was smooth and quiet. Just what she needed._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to end around here. Next chapter: back to their convo in Sara's quarters.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic in a while, so my writing is going to be rusty. Also haven't planned out any of this story hehe, just writing as I go along. There's gonna be some lines borrowed from the game, with my additions. I'm gonna follow the story line, but not focus too much on cut scenes that everyone's seen already, you know? I'd rather focus on the in betweens. Another thing is that the timeline is kinda blurry and so if stuff is off, sorry about that!


End file.
